Fan Fic - For Crying Out Loud Chapter 1 "The Middle of Nowhere"

[lucky4me1]

Title: For Crying Out Loud
Author: lucky4me1
Chapter 1 of 2
Rating: R for language

Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. They belong to ATWT, PGP and CBS. No profit is intended.

Note: I was loading a bunch of cd's on my new Ipod and came across a Meatloaf CD with one of my favorite songs "For Crying Out Loud" which not only made me think of my college days (I just gave my age away) but the words reminded me so much of the boys that it inspired me to write this little 2 chapter story of how I imagine the next week should go.


Chapter 1 – The Middle of Nowhere

“Where the fuck is it?” Noah shouted to no one as he tore through the desk drawers in front of him. ‘It has to be here somewhere’ he thought as he moved from the desk to the closet, angrily pulling out boxes and dumping their contents onto his dorm room floor.

Finally he found it, hidden behind a bag of dirty laundry. He grabbed the bottle, unscrewed the top and took a giant swig. The strong, pungent liquid burned the back of his throat. He winced from the burn, his eyes squeezed tight forcing the tears that had been forming to roll down his cheeks. He took another gulp, thankful that his roommate always kept a bottle hidden somewhere in his room.

‘If it’s good enough for Luke, it’s good enough for me’ he rationalized as he continued to drink straight from the bottle.

Luke. Shit, just the mere thought of the name made him feel so many emotions. There was anger and hurt and betrayal and God help him love. How could he still feel love after tonight? After Luke admitted that he was the one to kiss another man.

Noah’s cell phone rang for the umpteenth time and without looking at the display, he pulled it from his pocket and threw it against the wall with all his strength, shattering it in a thousand pieces, silencing it for good.

He sat on the edge of his bed, hanging his head and staring down at his hands. One hand held the bottle he was sure would drown his pain, the other hand was swollen and bloody. The physical pain of the injured hand was nothing compared to the emotional wreckage that Luke’s actions had caused. Noah took yet another gulp of liquor as he justified having punched Brian. ‘He’s been after Luke for weeks. I should have beat the crap out of him when I found out about the first kiss. Maybe then we wouldn’t be here, things would be different’.

Noah relived the night in his mind. It wasn’t supposed to end this way. Noah had it all planned out, after a romantic night at Metro, he would surprise Luke with a hotel room at the Lakeview. He would finally be able to prove to Luke that he wanted him more than anything in the world.

As he thought about what could have been, his tears flowed steadily. He lay back on his bed and curled up into a ball, hugging the liquor bottle, letting his sorrow overtake him until he fell into a troubled sleep.

************************************

*Bang, Bang, Bang* “Noah, I know you’re in there”. *Bang, Bang* “Noah , please” Luke begged “let me in”.

Noah stirred, hearing a thudding noise, waking him from his liquor induced reprieve.

*Bang, Bang* “Noah, please just open the door”.

Noah got up from the bed, and in a daze, walked to the door. He unlatched the lock and turned the knob, letting the door slide open a few inches before he turned around, not even looking at Luke who pushed the door open, walked inside and closed the door behind him.

In the darkness, Luke could see Noah’s retreating form as it moved back to the bed. Noah picked something up from the bed and sat down with his back to the wall, his legs bent with his knees tight against his chest.

Luke reached for the light switch and flicked it on causing Noah to swear, his eyes blinded by the sudden brightness. Luke finally got a good look at Noah and at his dorm room. The carnage before him was frightening. The room looked as if a tornado had blown through. And Noah, his beautiful Noah looked as if he had been run over. He couldn’t help but notice that he held a bottle in his hand and was taking a long drawn out swig from the jug.

“Noah, what are you doing?” Luke asked, already knowing the answer.

“What? Oh, sorry, where are my manners? Want some?” he said as he took another drink before extending his arm and offering the bottle to Luke.

“No I don’t want any” Luke answered with a judgmental edge to his voice.

“OK, more for me”.

“Noah, since when do you drink?”

“Well if it’s good enough for you, I figured why the hell not. No more playing by the rules for me. Where the fuck has that ever gotten me, nowhere that’s where. No, from now on I’m gonna do what ever the hell I wanna do. No more helping people even if they are friends. No more boy scout Noah. Nope I’m done.”

“Noah, you’re drunk. You don’t know what you’re saying.”

“Well if anyone would know drunk, it’s you”, Noah spewed at Luke.

“I guess I deserve that” Luke said as he slowly walked to the bed, winding his way through a mine field of debris strewn across the floor.

As Luke sat on the edge of the bed facing Noah, Noah retreated further into himself, clutching his knees tighter to his body. Luke reached out to touch Noah’s injured hand, lightly stroking the swollen knuckles as he spoke “Noah, please listen to me. I’m sorry”

Noah flinched at the touch and whispered “Don’t touch me”. Luke was about to ask if his hand hurt when Noah spoke again with anger “Don’t ever fucking touch me”.

Those words sent daggers through Luke’s heart and tears to his eyes. He looked into the icy blue pools of Noah’s eyes and saw anger and hurt and determination.

“Noah you don’t mean that”

“The fuck I don’t. If you want someone, go find Brian, obviously you have no problem touching him”.

“Noah, please just listen to me. I don’t want him, I want you. I know it’s no excuse, but I only kissed him because I was drunk and I thought you abandoned me”.

“Oh so now it’s my fault that you can’t keep your lips off of your Grandfather. Even the thought of it disgusts me”.

“He’s not my Grandfather” Luke objected “but you know that. You’re just pissed because someone finds me desirable. Obviously you don’t”. The words were out of his mouth before he realized what he was saying.

“You know what Luke you’re an ass”.

“I’m an ass? You’re the ass Noah. I’m not the one who always finds a reason to put everyone else’s needs before mine. First it was your father, then Ameera and now it’s Maddie. You know how much it hurts me to know that Maddie knows you in a way that I don’t. So what happens tonight, I turn around and you’re gone. You left with the one person I envy the most. It was supposed to be our night and you left with her without telling me. Do you know how worthless I felt?”.

“You just can’t get past the fact that Maddie and I slept together can you? Well I can’t change that fact, it happened. I don’t know how many times I have to tell you that she is my past, you’re my future”. Noah buried his head against his knees and mumbled. “At least I thought you were”. Luke could hear the catch in his voice as Noah started to sob.

Luke slid closer to Noah and tentatively put his arms around Noah’s shaking body, relieved that he didn’t pull away. “Oh baby, don’t cry. I’m sorry. I know I let my insecurities get the best of me. I’m an idiot. Can you forgive me?”

Luke got his answer when Noah moved his arms from around his knees and pulled Luke closer, nuzzling his face in his shoulder.

“I’ll forgive you, if you’ll forgive me. I’m sorry I didn’t make you feel wanted”. Noah leaned back and gazed into depths of Luke’s sweet hazel eyes. “Luke you have to know that I want you with every fiber of my being. I’m completely lost without you. I feel like I'm in the middle of nowhere when you’re gone”.

Luke pulled Noah in for a long, tender kiss. The strong taste of bourbon lingered on Noah’s lips and tongue, bringing Luke back to reality. He pulled back breaking the contact, confusing Noah.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing” Luke said as he touched his forehead to Noah’s. “You know I love you, right?”

“Yeah I do” Noah said as he stroked Luke’s cheek with his hand. “Will you stay with me?” he asked as he stretched out on his bed and pulled Luke down with him.

Luke snuggled against his warm body, as Noah’s arms encircled him and he felt a light kiss on his forehead. “I’m not going anywhere”.

After several peaceful minutes, Luke was sure Noah was asleep. He was wrong. “You know I’m not sorry I punched him” Noah whispered.

“I know” Luke said as he lazily traced his fingers along Noah’s chest.

“I’ll do it again”.

“You won’t have a reason to, I promise. Now go to sleep”.

“Good. Because I’ll totally do it”.

“Good night Noah”

“I love you Luke”

“Same here”.


Coming soon: Chapter 2 – Deeper and Deeper

[a_priori]

This is awesome!   Exactly the type of scenario one would expect of the boys given the circumstances they are in right now. We can only wish that the writers would put as much thought and effort into Luke and Noah's story as you have here lucky. I'll be looking forward to reading the next chapter.

[lucky4me1]

Thanks A, I'm glad you liked it.

[OSU21Male]

Lucky,

This is a great piece.  You really brought them back together nicely without taking it too far too fast.  You captured their mistakes well and vendicated each others' feelings to one another.  Sadly, I do not think this will be the outcome for the boys. I highly doubt the writers would write something this good and realistic.  You and I should write for this show, we would be able to draw the plot points out longer and in a more realistic tone; well provided we were the head writers.

[lucky4me1]

So you think we should stage a coup d'etat and overthrow the current writing staff? 

I don't know JP seems pretty tough, she'll go down fighting.

Seriously, thanks for reading and I'm glad you like it.  Sometimes when I don't get feedback I do start to wonder if my stuff really sucks and I should just stop kidding myself into thinking I can write.

[OSU21Male]

lucky4me1 wrote:

So you think we should stage a coup d'etat and overthrow the current writing staff? 

I don't know JP seems pretty tough, she'll go down fighting.

Seriously, thanks for reading and I'm glad you like it.  Sometimes when I don't get feedback I do start to wonder if my stuff really sucks and I should just stop kidding myself into thinking I can write.

You definately write well so don't doubt that.  We all produce scripts from time to time that are less than steller, so if you do write something and post it on here and get no or negative feedback try not to take it so hard.  Remember, everyone's a critic.  As for teaming up, I like the overthrowing JP idea, though, I think she is secretely a butch lesbian, so she will most definately put up a fight.  We will have to strategize and target the gay execs of P&G and CG, as he backed the Luke and Noah story from the get go.  For all the lesbians reading this, I didn't mean any harm, just stating what I have seen to be true and I love you gals a lot, you definately rock this world!!